What football needs is… more fish

I don’t know about you, but I was a little let down by the World Cup. I watched most of the games hoping to see flair, excitement, a bit of dynamism. Showing off, basically. What I got was bad refereeing and a headache from the vuvuzelas. 

We all want to be entertained by those moments of magic. Football (soccer if you’re an American) is fantastic. I grew up watching Tino Asprilla run rings around people for Keegan’s Newcastle United. Or the boys from Brazil in the 90s rip apart the other national teams. 

The Godlike striker that is Alan Shearer


Then there were the celebrations. Roger Milla doing the samba with the corner flag for Cameroon, and there were a few memorable acts after that. Remember Gazza re-enacting the dentist’s chair in 1996? Or Diego Maradona screaming into the lens of a tv camera in 1994? You must remember the robot from Peter Crouch in the Jamaica friendly before the 2006 World Cup? 

But these moments are rare beasts. Most goal celebrations are much more spur of the moment and even fairly sedate. A run into the arms of your team-mates, or a sprint towards your fans, that sort of thing. 

As a Newcastle United fan, I got very used to that most simple and yet iconic celebration of them all. Alan Shearer with one finger raised to the skies as he runs back to the halfway line. 

But these (yes, even the robot!) were pushed into the shade by the celebration I’m about to show you. It’s from an unknown overseas team and probably took minutes to choreograph on the training ground. Genius. 

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